Keep up the inspiration of being positive : )

Yeah, that one is always a great reminder for me. By actually visualizing it when you are around negative people, it’s even more effective as a motivator for you to get out of there!

I really love the metaphor of swimming in a muddy river and not being able to get out without some mud still on you.

I hear you. I’ve had jobs as well as relationships in the past that in retrospect I see that the environment itself was toxic to varying degrees.

One of the reasons why I write the content that I do is to inform people who might not realize what is going on until they see their situation described, and then they can take the steps to fix it!

You voiced the wisdom of the ages when you said “I”m staying positive”.

As long as you are truly able to stay positive (as opposed to just WANTING to stay positive), you will be fine.

Marital issues are trying, to be sure, especially when there are children involved, but as with all things, MORE negativity will only make the situation worse.

Stick to your guns, Dean, and keep taking the high road. The view is always better from up there!

I love this post. It’s timing is appropriate because my children’s mother is one of the Energy Vampires.

It’s amazing how she can say one thing to representatives of our legal system, then do and/or say something completely different when they are not around. I know this descriptive word about her brings up negative connotations, but ‘hypocrite’ is so very appropriate.

The best part of this whole issue is I’m staying positive among all the negative she slings and it all works out for me.

Take care and keep up the good work.

I am truly grateful to have been able to help!

Reminders about positive practices never hurt since all of us can fall into negative behavior patterns, and often without even realizing it!

Glad you stopped by, Ruth, and that I could be of assistance.

I am, generally, a very positive person, but I did recognize my own behaviors in several of the things you posted. (embarrassed grin)

Recognition is the first step to change, so thank you for helping me take that first step.

I appreciate the positive feedback!

Believe me, I had the work environment in mind when I wrote this post, so please do take the lessons on the job with you!

Wow – I appreciate your faith in me. I hope my answer lives up to it!

There is a similar situation in my life surrounding my mother-in-law. She thinks that I walk on water because she is very “old school” about the place of men vs. women in the grand scheme of things. However, when it comes to dealing with other family members, including my wife and step-kids, she is about as negative and energy draining as you could imagine.

My wife used to get very upset about it, as her mother can be understandably infuriating. However, the advice that I gave to her was to just ignore the comments themselves, to redirect her mother away from the negative whenever possible, and to just be honest with her mother that neither her (my wife) nor the kids are willing to be around her when she is being negative.

At first it just got scoffed at and nothing much changed, but as both my wife and the kids

A) Stopped talking to her when she started being negative, and

B) stopped going to see her as often, the situation eventually became much more manageable.

She is an elderly woman and we have no beliefs about actually changing her understandings about life. However, we have helped her to realize that if she wants us to be a part of her life, there are certain things that are simply not allowed, and if the not-allowed behavior presents itself, then we cease participating.

So, it’s not quite the “avoid the person completely” answer, but it’s also not the “just ignore them” answer. Rather, I suggest a hybrid approach of selective listening, appropriate redirection, and if all else fails, exit stage left!

Hope that helps, Gayla!

When a person continuously goes around another (a relative let’s say) and that person is negative all the time and ridicules every chance they get should people -

A. Be the bigger person and ACT like it doesn’t bother them?

or

B. Just stay away altogether and when asked why, should the person be brutally honest?

I’ve been asked this question numerous times through my blended family blog. I was just wondering if my own advice of just staying away altogether was the appropriate or not.

I figured you are likely the best person on the planet to ask that question…

Thanks for the positive comments!

I have always leaned more towards being positive than being negative, but once I realized just how much negativity I was surrounded by, I almost ran for the hills!

Now I just do my best to deflect or defuse negative situations, and for the most part, I am successful. I’m sure others will be as well when they start to realize that doing so isn’t really that difficult.

Stay Positive!

Andy

Thanks for your comments! It is often very difficult indeed to detach ourselves emotionally from a situation.

Add to that the fact that whenever we get upset about something – no matter how justified we are in being upset – the negativity that is generated will still simply serve to attract more of the same.

Being positive is a hard lifestyle to maintain at times, but it is definitely worth it!

You are absolutely correct. The acknowledgment of a negative situation is not a bad thing. It is only through contrast that we even know “good” or “bad” when we see it.

However, as you said, it is the repeated focus on the “bad” that doesn’t do us much good.

Great thoughts, Grigor – thanks for sharing!

Excellent article on negativity! To be able to detach your emotion from a actual situation that you are directly in is not easy. However, with practice, it is definitely possible.

Attracting good things that you desire in your life starts with being positive and focus on only the things you desire. This is only the beginning…

Alison Lee
http://www.abundanceattracting.com

Thanks – glad you enjoyed it!