There are many who believe that in order to achieve success, we must follow the successful examples of the people who have come before us. Although that idea has merit, and on some levels can be a part of your achievements, the problem with that mentality is that not everyone is the same.
Just because one guy went from rags to riches after a life full of angst and sorrow does not mean that his system for becoming successful will work for someone else. Just because some lady was able to buck the system and achieve radical success against all odds does not mean that whatever she did will apply to the lives of other people.
The basic idea behind those types of success stories is that there were baseline personality traits that those people consistently exhibited; confidence, tenacity, ambition, focus, consistency, just to name a few.
In addition, although there are certainly success mindsets, the bottom line is that if any given success system is not working for you personally, or if you simply don't want to use it, then you need to find a new way to succeed. You need to break through the walls of normalcy, shatter the accepted norms of society, and do something truly remarkable.
When you do THAT, you'll grow whether you want to or not. Here are 5 great ways to change your stars that require you to do something other than listening to the same self improvement dogma that you have already heard so many times before.
Quit
No, I don't mean quit trying, I mean quit whatever circumstances have consistently been holding you back; and yes, that could certainly mean your job, your relationships, or even your friendships.
People are so afraid that they won't be able to succeed in the various areas of their lives that they cling to lame or generic circumstances like a life raft, but then wonder why their lives aren't getting any better.
If you want something better, then go GET something better. Do it like you mean it, too, and don't be a pansy about it. If you've got what it takes on the inside (and you do), then you will excel no matter where you go, or what you do.
Stop clinging to the parts of your life that you don't like. Cut the cord, free yourself, and go create the life you want to live by quitting the circumstances that are not to your liking.
Unattainable Goals
Go after goals that are so radically outside of what you think you are capable of that most people will think you are insane for even making the attempt:
- If you're single, find the hottest girl or guy that you know. Pick a person that makes you trip over your own two feet when you are in their presence. Got one all picked out? OK, good - now go ask that person out.
- If you want to work for the company that is the "cream of the crop" in your industry, march right in there with your resume' and tell them that you want a job. When they shoot you down, call them incessantly until they give you an interview. No stalking allowed, but anything other than that is fair game.
- If you want to lose weight, set an "Oh my God, my life would be GREAT" type of weight loss goal, and make it your entire life's purpose to attain that goal - but only for a week or two.
What is the purpose behind doing these over the top activities? In every single instance, even if you fall flat on your face and meet with little or no success, you will have gained something far more valuable than a phone number, a job offer, or a few pounds off of the scale.
You will have proven to yourself that you are confident enough to spit in the face of adversity, to throw caution to the wind, and to go after what you want, regardless of how unattainable it may seem.
From that point forward, no challenge will ever have the power to shake your rock-solid foundations.
Invent Something
Why haven't you attained your goals yet? Simple: you haven't found the product/service/opportunity/motivation/partner/resource, etc., that you need. Yes, there are plenty of individual reasons why people don't attain their goals, but they all boil down to the same thing: a lack of whatever it is they need to make it happen.
Maybe it's counseling, or a new weight loss product, or a coach, or a book, or a community, or {insert your reason here}. If there is a reason why you have not attained your goals, do you honestly think that you are the only person in that boat??
It is very likely that there are hundreds of thousands or even millions of people who have also not attained their goals for the same reason(s) that you haven't attained yours. Figure out what that reason is, and then invent the solution:
- It might be a book you write called The Commoner's Guide to Relationship Wizardy.
- It might be a website you create called….I don't know…Personal Development Partners.
- It might be an exercise program called Weight Loss for Fat Wives and Good-for-Nothing Husbands.
- It might be a counseling service called Your life Sucks and Mine used to, So you Should Listen to Me.
Some of those are obviously over the top examples, but you should get the point. If you need a certain something to kick yourself in the pants so that you'll achieve success, other people need it, too. By inventing it, not only do you create the solution for yourself, but you get to make money while you're at it. Bonus!
Escape
No, not in a "run away with your tail between your legs kind of way," but rather in a "you people are crazy, so I'm outta here" kind of way.
If the people in your circle of influence are not conducive to the achievement of your goals, then simply stay away from them. You know who they are, and they know who they are, too, so there will be no surprises when you exit stage left.
If you can't physically get away from the people that you are presently allowing to hold you back, then simply change your mindset towards them. Instead of seeing them as an anchor that is dragging you down to the depths, see them as an excellent example of how not to act. The more they act in a manner that is inconsistent with what pleases you, the more opportunities you will have to act in the opposite manner.
Everyone can at least be used as a bad example!
Trailblaze
The phrase "if you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten" is as true on an individual level as it is on a global level.
If human beings had never exercised their right and their ability to expand and create, then we would all still be living in caves, wearing furs, and enjoying a life expectancy of about 35 years.
The more you do not like the circumstances of your life, the more opportunities you have to blaze a new trail that has never been created before. Simply take a look around at how everyone else is trying to do whatever it is that you want to do, and find something that is as far opposite of their methods as possible.
- When The Beatles made rock n' roll mainstream, no one thought it would last.
- When the concept of a "personal" computer was first introduced, it was laughed at, and people couldn't imagine why anyone would want one.
- When cellular telephones first came out, they were literally big enough to be used as lethal weapons.
What could you do differently that would not only allow you to grow as a person, but that would potentially impact the world at large?
Is that vision too big for you? If so, maybe that's why you are still sitting where you're sitting.
These out of the box methods of personal growth and development should have opened your eyes to the fact that success comes not from doing what other people do, but rather from using effective habits, and then creating your own system - one that is custom built for you, but that might also change the world.
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Quotable Quotes and Merchandise for the Offline World
This will be the final edition of the Doing it Differently blog carnival hosted at Today is that Day, so I have made this edition the most information packed edition yet!
